Saturday, May 31, 2014

beautifying Bessie

hi there

ok, so this is probably the last post of May. well, it is unless in the post arrives that In The Name Of The King rubbish, i somehow watch it all before midnight and feel obliged to do a blog post on it.

speaking of post, two items of an automobile nature arrived. as in respect of 50% of them i was legally compelled to start using one of them today (or tomorrow), i decided that today was indeed as good a day as any to do something i could have done over the last week or so.

right after, of course, i had found where i had shoved them for safe keeping.

i would imagine you can work out what the above is, by means of using either your good eyesight or simply scrolling down to look at the other pictures.

yes indeed, for all of those who have scrolled ahead, my imagination does quite stretch as far as suggesting that a new car / road tax disc thing is a worthwhile subject to do a blog post on. a pretty sad and pathetic life and outlook expressed by me, isn't it?

the tax thing is, of course, of little interest - it is the tax disc holder "for the win" here.

yeah, that's right. i was browsing on them web shops for a car tax disc holder and found one which featured the image of The King, Elvis Presley. i know this means you are all jealous and that because obviously it means i have a better car than you now, but please do not take me for one who is bragging about it or showing off. i just want you all to appreciate the beauty and excellence of it.

i am not sure why they just do not make it a law or requirement that all vehicles of the road must feature an image of The King, Elvis Presley to make them legal. does not have to be just of the road i suppose, could also do it for planes, boats and that.

actually "legal requirement" is how i have got away with this one. James expressed some mild disgust, displeasure and general anger at the idea of having The King, Elvis Presley on proud display in the car. he does not like Him as much as he could, look you see.

i got around this by, in a moment of genius, saying that the British Police made it a law that you had to have The King, Elvis Presley in the car. by jove, golly gosh, he believed it!

the down side, however, is that he says that he "hates" the constabulary for making what he believes to be a "stupid and silly" law. oh, whoops. oh well, i am sure he doesn't really hate them. but if he does, well, so what, small price to pay for the peaceful celebration of my ace new car sticker.

to give you a bit of a break from the formidable excellence of the car, here is my excellent breakfast of choice, pictured for the benefit of my sister during the week.

that is, as you have probably clocked, a bacon and cheese Subway sandwich with a "regular" coffee flavoured coffee. two pounds on the nose, since you asked, is the cost. magnificent it is.

Gillian reckons from a health and budget perspective i should probably have a healthier at home breakfast during the week. she is probably correct and that, but life is easier if i just ignore comments of that nature. not easier, i suppose, better and tastier is what i think i mean.

anyway, back to Bessie. Bessie is called Bessie, as regular readers will be aware, because that is what Gran called the car on one of our regular tours of the magnificent James Cook medical facility. so that is the name of the car from now on.

the only "down" side of this is that i do not get to have as much benefit as i could from driving around showing off The King, Elvis Presley. Bessie is mostly operated by my (considerably) better half, so it is she that will with pride be driving around, letting the people - no matter what lowly, unworthy of it peasant status they have - seeing Him in this fine and splendid image, one that was well worth the 80p or so i spent on it.

i have gone to great lengths via MS Paint, you will see, to cover up any important details of the tax disc. which is a waste, since they are on public display anyway. however, please don't do any fraud or that if you see any details that i did not cover up and that. thanks.

another enhancement i made to Bessie was some extensive new bodywork. here it is.

yeah, it's not really supposed to look like that. the thing is, right, i left the door open on a rather windy day, and it bent the door all the way back with some force, doing the above. whoops.

i should probably get it fixed or mended, but i figure we might sell the car before i bother myself with getting around to that sort of thing. besides, my cousin Robert has not as yet, or as such, gotten around to sharing with me the details of a car mender he says is the most suitable to use.

another look at the class road and car tax sticker of The King, Elvis Presley, but from a different angle? sure, why not.

road and car tax here is excellent. you can pay for it every 6 or 12 months, which helps the budget. a slight downer is that you have to get it checked and tested as being worthy on the road every year too. no such requirement in South Africa, of course, where you only get the road worthiness and suitability of it tested when you buy. and even then, usually one can simply bribe their way to having it declared fit for purpose.

the above is probably why there are a good deal more many accidents on the road in SA, but hey ho, not at all for me to judge such matters.

nope, no sign of this rubbish starring Statham and Liotta in the post yet. either we have not had any post today, or Mr Postie King has not been past us as such. perhaps later, or during the week.

one more look at the car / road tax disc holder sticker of The King, Elvis Presley? done.

back in the realm, briefly, of car maintenance, Robert giving me the details of the car menders would probably be smart, as all sorts of lights keep going off and that. the most recent one seems to relate to breaks or something, or is suggesting that one can do some class skids.

do i have any particular interest in car maintenance? not really any more now that i am north of the equator than i had when i was south of it, in truth. i do miss my team of expert mechanics, in particular Jayson, as and when things like this blip on the car. he is excellent at getting stuff like that sorted out.

anyway, i am off to stand in the road, looking at the class sticker. and maybe eat some ribs or something too.

be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, May 29, 2014

mediocre Schwarzenegger and comic nostalgia

hi there

i could, i suppose, just let the pictures do the talking here to go with that title. however, let me allow you to be indulged with the idea of indulging me with some waffle of words, or wordy waffle, to go along with it all.

every now and then, right, i get a sense of nostalgia about something that is (gasp) over 30 years old. i get an incidental memory of something that was quite class, try to search for it and then never find it. at least, that is, until today.

it seems that my searching for Tales Of The Uncanny was where i went wrong. the comics i remembered, from a holiday in the tropics of Torquay and the colours of Cornwall, were in fact called Uncanny Tales. oh. cheers for that, google, in not working it out sooner. your spy stuff is not all that brilliant after all, is it?

i found a fair of info today about them, then. like, for instance, they were printed by some company called Alan Class Comics, and a guess would be that the company was in some way linked to a chap called Alan. they were printed, amid a touch of controversy about little minor matters of copyright, permissions and all that sort of silly bother, between 1959 and 1989. and the target market for them, going on the lists of places you could buy them, were indeed coastal and seaside towns. so i remembered right, if that makes any sense.

just really writing it down here so if i get nostalgic once more, or have an urge to look for them again and forget that i did, here it is.

meanwhile, further postal joy today.

yeah, that right there is a set featuring two of the lesser works in the spectacular filmography of Arnold Schwarzenegger. i would agree that the above does not represent the most astute purchase i have ever made. it was kind of done on a whim, right, after a debate, of the healthy variety, around how class white suits are and how smart Charles "Chas" Dance is. this culminated in a visit to the doorway of the dreadful Last Action Hero, which i now own a copy of.

The 6th Day is one of the more interesting entries in the mediocre films of Arnie. he did this one around the time that he decided he had enough of flexing his acting versatility and wished instead to go into politics like his Dad, Clint Eastwood. worked out well, i seem to recall.

but anyway, back to these cartoon / comic book things that i got all excited about.

from what i can remember, i spent as much of my pocket money as my Mum & Dad let me on class comic books that looked like this. i sat and read them from cover to cover by the tent or down on the beach.

can i remember a single one of the stories i read, or even the cover of them? no, not at all. i still, though, for some reason have nothing but fond memories of them, thinking they were awesome, amazing things.

would love to get my hands on a few of them again, for nostalgia certainly but also because they were just so damned entertaining. a search around the sellers of the net say they are available, but at a premium price in some cases. a few you can pick up for a fiver or so, which is not so bad. the ones that are over one hundred notes, however, are not getting touched by my finances, thank you.

so anyway, this whole Last Action Hero business. it truly was a horrid affair, that film was. it came from an era when Hollywood decided that they would make "less violent" films, and for some reason film producers got it into their heads that we, the public with coins of money, wanted to see the likes of Schwarzenegger and Stallone in light hearted romps. we did not.

i went, as it happens, to the cinema to see Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot, a film starring a very embarrassed Sylvester Stallone. if i remember Gillian wished to go and see it, as for some reason she thought it would be good. it was not.

Last Action Hero was worse. much worse.

the big problem with Last Action Hero was the major problem films at that time had. that is the idea they had of casting the most scruffy, obnoxious, nasal, whiny annoying kid they could find, someone guaranteed to get on the tits of an audience, and yet they were expected to be interested in him, indeed sympathetic. much of what was wrong with Terminator 2 - and there was much - could have been fixed or covered up with the casting of someone less annoying that Edward Furlong as John Connor.

the kid in Last Action Hero was awful. his voice lacked every quality bar screechy scraped tin, and he looked just like you wished to punch him in the face all the time.

i am not looking forward to watching it again, you may have gathered. not at all. but i will, just to see if this business of Chas and white suits has any merit.

so yeah, all this Uncanny Tales business.

i probably should go past the most excellent shop where i got that Game Of Thrones thing for my (considerably) better half from, should i not? i may redeem myself in their eyes a bit.

i mean, i am assuming when i walked in there and asked for "anything that features that lass that does the dragons and that on that show" they probably had me down as a totally ignorant dick. if i walk in there, right, and say "i am looking for some of the works of Alan Class Comics, please", it might impress them a little bit.

if they actually have any of them, well then so much the better, you would say.

failing that, i will hawk around all these second hand bookshops and charity stores. you never know, fortune may smile upon me and i may well find one or two of them. or, also, maybe not. would be class if you could just buy or otherwise obtain "digital" copies, let me have a look at the original USA source for the things. King Features or something, i think.

so, yeah, that would be that for this post, almost. do i go right ahead and shove Last Action Hero in the DVD player? not sure i am that brave......

be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wednesday, May 28, 2014

further FAGS by SPIROS

hello there

well, the title of this blog post pretty much tells you what to expect, but let us pretend that you did not see the title and are just reading this "blind" so i can build up some sort of element of surprise.

not one, not three, not several, but two items of interest arrived in the post today, some of them even partially addressed to me. i am sorry, but i shall never stop being in awe of a postal system that works properly. you have no idea what misery is caused by an unreliable, bad postal service. well, you don't unless you are reading this in South Africa.

behold, then, the parcels.

in the brown one was not, somewhat alas, some filth or mucky books as you may have expected. no, far from it, it was some very healthy and good for you Marlboro. all the way from the tropics of Senegal, thanks to my dear chum Spiros. nice one mate, much appreciated.

by the way, cheers to all of you that have noted the "testimonials" thing i added. took ages to do, that. in a week or so, or when bored, i will change and freshen up the quotes. thanks for the ace suggestions provided so far.

oh yes, you will want to see the mountain of Marlboro. look, behold, admire, appreciate.

apparently me not doing capital letters is a bit of an issue again. like it is my fault that both the poster for the silence of the lambs and the cover of the first tin machine album look so ace all in lower case.

we shall get to the healthy aspect of these Marlboro later, but it is worth here mentioning how cost effective they seem to be in the land of Senegal, wherever that is. Africa, somewhere, maybe. it seems that the incident from a few years ago where Marlboro started selling cheap there continues today, going on the price Spiros quoted me on these. if not lower now than then, if you click on the link and behold how fortunate the people of Senegal are.

if that lower price is something to do with being exploited, then i would very much like to encourage Philip Morris to pop over here and just go right ahead and exploit the hell out of my arse, thanks.

meanwhile, what the hell is this?

yes, i know the hell it is would be a Duran Duran board game, thanks. what i mean is how can this have existed for close to 30 years and only now is it that i learn of it?

looks crap, if we are honest. i mean this was 1985 or 1986, maybe 1984. Frankie Goes To Hollywood got a futuristic and class Commodore 64 game, whilst Simes and the boys get a traditional parlour game. strange.

anyway, the other parcel. a very nice, exceptionally welcome and greatly appreciated bundle that features some more literature adventures for me to have on the bus, and indeed some truly splendid items that celebrate all things ace and excellent off of South Park.

anyway, returning to this world of healthy Marlboro. they must, i assume, be a healthy version of this much loved product, as there are no warning signs or messages on them at all.

actually Spiros reckons that there is a brief, in passing, suggestion there in French about how one should not "misuse" the product as it would be "naughty". which is not, i think you will agree, the kind of warnings we have seen on this blog over the years.

does it actually say what Spiros says it does? well, yeah, i guess. why would i express distrust in the lad? he has this wish to live a distinctly Parisian life, so i am assuming he knows a lot more of the language than i do, taunt pis and all that.

looky here, look you see, also no warnings on the front or back.

i would be pretty sure that all Marlboro are fine to use anyway. why is it, exactly, that someone would willingly make a product that causes harm? it does not make much sense, man, some business type making a partially addictive thing and exploiting it for their own gain, in particular if it was harmful. surely no corporate organization would operate like that; least of all a Swiss one. the Swiss are known for their honesty, integrity and transparency, after all.

on one TV channel is Danny Dyer, on the other is Dolph Lundgren. that is the Lord of Televsion casting punishment on me for the above statement, isn't it?

anyway, i shall be giving these most latest fags by Spiros a go shortly. presently my efforts to quit / cut down considerably on smoking have, as you are aware, been totally undermined by Vinnie Jones presenting smoking as an integral part of twatting dragons with spears. or harpoons, or whatever it was.

anyway, some flowers.

the more observant of you will have noticed that Spiros seemed to send something else other than class Marlboro to me. indeed he did. two very fine, interesting looking boxes called 'Motives', them being those cannister things for e-cigarettes, or if you like the "business end" of an e-cigarette.

if you are unsure of what a "business end" of anything is, watch any Joe Pesci film that is not him doing that comedy stuff. when he sets about someone with a gun, a spanner, a screwdriver, a pen or a baseball bat, the bit that connects with whoever has displeased his (usually far too sensitive) character is the "business end".

anyway, the e-cigarette "business ends".

i appreciate that these pictures, taken with the blueberry thing, are not the clearest, bit i think you can at the least see that they are called "motives", with one pack being chocolate love and the other pack being cherry surprise. rather unclear is that they have "16mg" written on them. i am unsure as to if this is "16mg" of nicotine or tar, but in either case that would be 50% or so more of either that Marlboro have in them.

to me the idea of sticking any level of nicotine or tar into chocolate or cherry flavoured things is exciting, so i am very much looking forward to having a go with these babies.

it is jolly decent, civil and touching of Spiros to join the ranks of those friends i have around the world that are encouraging my failing attempts to knock on the head all of this smoking business. that my chum Spiros believes the world is better with me in it, with my lungs in relative working order, is a most pleasant compliment to get. aaah.

anyway, that will do for now, methinks. almost time for me to move back into the world of Marlboro thanks to the kindness of Spiros.

be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

age of the dragons

hi there

strewth, my Aussie readers may well say, i have uploaded a whole load of pictures here. can i justify the pictures with text? possibly not, although probably. let's try.

one of the highlights of watching that film UFO which did not involve obtaining intimate knowledge of Sean Brosnan's bum was, you will recall, seeing a trailer for a class looking film called Age Of The Dragons. yes, i did indeed order it not long after and have recently watched it, hence this blog post.

here i am with the DVD, doing that one eye / cyclops thing as a partial tribute to a friend of mine that is currently experiencing some eye problems of note. get well soon, and don't waste valuable eye capacity reading this nonsense.

what is Age Of The Dragons like? we will get to that, but up front i must say that i consider it to be somewhat better than the 3.3 rating IMDB users award it. but then again IMDB users are easily led astray, giving 8.0 to that rubbish The Artist and a highly disturbing 8.8 to that pro-war, pro-right wing rubbish that was Forrest Gump.

before we get to the film, then, the start of a worrying trend. there was another class trailer on this disc, this time for something called In The Name Of The King A Dungeon Siege Tale or something like that.

look! Henry Hill out of GoodFellas is in it.

apparently he plays a wizard or something, one of them people that do magic and that.

also look, Jason "the Stath" Statham is in it, looking quite bored and appearing as if the content and material of this film was substantially beneath his standards and skills. which is, as much as i have enjoyed many of his films, one hell of a statement to be making.

it is, as far as i can work out, a film that takes nothing but pride in being "a poor man's Lord Of The Rings". as the rich man's version of Lord Of The Rings was not all that great, i figure just how bad can this one be? i will find out soon-ish, as it happens, as yes indeed i have placed an order for it. although with a 151 minute running time i have no idea when i will see it. IMDB users seem to score it at 3.8 so i am sure it will be class.

class indeed, in particular, as it seems that at one point Ray Liotta does some fancy torture stuff on Crank with one of them magic stick things.

Burt Reynolds is also in it, i believe, as some sort of King or something. should be class, that.

but you don't want that right now, you want to know of this Age Of The Dragons business.

here is the DVD menu screen for your enjoyment, appraisal, comment or whatever the hell it is you feel like doing with the image off of a DVD menu screen. knock yourself out.

on to the film then. a short version is that yes indeed it is "Moby Dick with dragons". it is the personification of all things that are "average" - meaning it is an entertaining, decent enough film and there are many worse ways to spend 90 minutes or so of your life. if you are a fan of Vinnie Jones, Danny Glover, out of the box adaptations of novels or dragons, the this film is for the, well, not so much "win" as for the "respectable draw".

so, with that said,


it starts off, as fantasy and such films are prone to do, with a touch of historical background setting and clarification stuff. like, you know, the party bits in Lord Of The Rings, before they all started getting all gayed up and excited about seeing, of all things, a volcano.

in Age Of The Dragons, this back story bit is rather smart, as it shows the young Captain Ahab, in the context of this film that being the young Danny Glover, trying to twat a dragon with a knife after the dragon has apparently just knacked his sister to death.

i am assuming that these particular images will answer questions that some of you will have in respect of "are the dragon special effects any good". i believe the answer in this respect is yes. they are fine, and decent enough for a lower budget than, say, Spielberg operates on, and realistic enough for presenting imaginary creatures.

my theory on dragons is that at some point in the middle, dark or whatever ages, right, some chap stumbled on dinosaur bones / fossils. seeing them appearing all black and charred, they may well have just created a theory about how it was a beast that could breathe fire, and that was how they were knacked, what with them not having class carbon dating equipment then.

still, some of you wish to believe that these dragons were all real and that, so far be it from me to stand in the way, be merry with your beliefs and it would be ace if they turned out to be correct. not quite so ace, of course, if they turned out to be correct via one of them dragons turning up and breathing fire all over.

anyway, on we go with the story, and that whole "call me Ishmael" thing gets events going proper, in a tavern or similar bar type of establishment. some lingering shots on the finer points of the bar maidens for the gentry, by the way, but here is Ishmael with his mate that might be called TikTik or Queequeg or something.

Ishmael and his mate are busying trying to get on to the ship, craft (you will see just now) or whatever it is that Captain Ahab commands, as Ishmael is quite aroused by the idea of going around and smacking dragons around a bit. was, in Moby Dick, Ishmael all excited about going Japan on whales? been a while since i saw or read it, so not sure on the enthusiasm level.

anyhow Stubbs, played by celebrated character actor Vinnie Jones, is listening, so he encourages Ishmael to prove his worth by having a contest in the art of twatting paintings with smart dragon harpoon spears.

treasure the above image, ladies and gents, for it is just about the only scene in the film to feature Vinnie Jones not smoking his class, in-no-way-ripped-off-from-Gandalf pipe. as you know i am very passionate in my ways against smoking, so it upset me to see Vinnie promoting pipe use amongst the viewers of this movie.

that said, it is class when Vinnie throws his hardcore harpoon spear thing at a threatening painting whilst smoking a pipe, so i shall probably take up smoking.

so any ill-health or dire consequence of me smoking are all on Vinnie Jones, then. i am sure the burden of this shall weight in a rather heavy way upon his shoulders, something that may inspire him to even more class acting greatness.

onwards then, to the Pequod, it being the ship of Captain Ahab. except it is not a ship, it is a class tank thing that runs with no engine or fumes being expelled. it also tends to run in a way that is always obscured for the benefit of the camera, so presumably it is in fact powered by a team of Yugoslavian relics pushing it along, with them hidden for dramatic effect, or if you like affect.

what of Captain Ahab himself? well, he crops up every now and then in the movie, in the form of Danny Glover. yes, that one off of the Lethal Weapon films, and some others. he was in Silverado, i think, and a really bad fishing comedy with Joe Thingie that was also in Lethal Weapon from time to time. that one that went "ok ok ok ok ok" a lot.

Danny Glover, despite being (depending on how you see it) as either the protagonist or the primary antagonist of the story, is not in it all that much. i think the producers scrambled together enough money to hire an actor of his stature for about a week, and thus did some "strategic" filming of him to season the film with.

there seems, in the circle of ardent and devout Age Of The Dragons lovers and haters, some debate as to whether Danny Glover is over-acting in the film, or if he is just doing normal acting that looks like over-acting in the face of the poor, shoddy acting on display from everyone else. i would suggest it's a case of neither, yet both. no one delivers award winning performances, but no one is that bad either.

anyway, Vinnie getting ready for some class dragon twatting, and oh look he is smoking again.

and for those of you interested in such things, here is another dragon doing that fire thing. are dragons meant to be this hostile and angry? i suppose when they have a former professional footballer - an FA Cup winning one, note - throwing spears at them then yes, but in general?

in that whole prequel / prologue segment at the start of the film, the young Captain Ahab got a bit knacked off of the dragon. this left his skin all battered and that, and means that he cannot be exposed to direct sunlight. somewhat like the glittering twats off of that Twilight nonsense, except different and more dragon related. this would mean that Captain Ahab frequently features in the film looking like this.

this which, of course, is not Danny Glover playing Captain Ahab. it's some random Yugoslavian relic that they have simply dressed up. hats off to the makers, i say, for working around their limited resources and lack of money to pay Danny to work outside on location.

anyhow, after that bout of Dragon twatting, Ishmael needs some medical attention, and Rachel, Ahab's adopted daughter, dishes it out.

this film has a "12" certificate, which means no one under 12 should see it. but what's the actual content like? well, no bad language, no nudity, a mild and non-graphic scene of an attempted sexual assault and only one or two scenes of what you would consider graphic or possibly disturbing violence, all blink and you will miss it.

i think if my eldest son watched this then he would, for life, embrace it as "one of the greatest things ever" when it in fact is not, rather like i did with The Sword & The Sorcerer, or my chum JG did Hawk The Slayer. or, if you like, exactly how Spiros did with that Village People film, Can't Stop The Music or whatever it was.

one of the most graphic scenes - and it's not all that graphic - features going to dragon mountain and killing 30 or so dragons as they sleep.

i mention it as there's a bizarre sequence where three of them put the hoods up on their jackets first.

must be smart hoods, them, if they make them either invisible or can resist the fire of dragons.

here's some more class Danny Glover action for all you Danny Glover fans. it must irk him somewhat that most review his entire film career as being "he was class in that bit of Lethal Weapon where he sat on a toilet and a bomb went off". that bit, for a start, was nowhere near as good as the bit where he twatted someone with a nail gun.

you kind of imagine that Danny Glover checks the newspaper every day to see if Mel has issued a big ad saying "sorry blacks and Jews i was wrong", paving the way to let Lethal Weapon 5 be made. until then, i guess the Gloves is making films like these, using his skills to pay the bills.

actually, Danny is rather good in this. his final soliloquy / speech thing is pretty impressive, and justified the cost of seeing the movie. Danny should be given more decent and substantial film roles, really, but noooooo, they all always want to cast Denzel or that Don Cheadle bloke.

last picture for the film coming up then, featuring our merry dragon slayers on their way up dragon mountain, towards the valley of dragons, so that Ahab might be able to twat this white dragon which upset him so much.

i don't think i have given too many spoilers here. if you are sort of half familiar with Moby Dick, and are kind of aware of the prolcivity Americanski films have for certain types of semi-positive endings, you kind of know what to expect. or, indeed, do you?

and that's that, really.

would i recommend the film? oddly, yes. i paid a quid or so to obtain the film and would very comfortably say that i got decent value out of it. i can't see me willingly watching it again, mind. i would like to think that a bunch of 10 - 12 year olds, not brought up on a world of Grand Theft Auto and similar, would enjoy it. if so much as one of them were inspired to read the novel Moby Dick, or see the decent film version of it, well then so much the better.

and of all the cheap, nasty rubbish that Vinnie Jones seems to have decided is now his career, this one is comparatively oustanding.

happy watching if you watch!

be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, May 26, 2014


hello there

well, Monday here. as it was everywhere that uses the same calendar, i suppose. it was a holiday here too, which was the perfect reason to celebrate the very being of my (considerably) better half with some gifts.

i would suspect that some of you might be interested in seeing what such gifts i opted to get, so here you go, with the minimal of waffle and words from me.

yeah, that is a cheese grater in the shape of one of them electric guitar things. yes that has been the most popular of the gifts, and yes indeed it was the cheapest. it always works out that way, for some reason.

oh, i also got her this. it is one of them characters off of that Game Of Thrones thing, this one being her particular favourite of them. well, favourite that is still alive.

i am not 100% sure what her actual name is, but when we are watching it, right, i just call her Mrs Mongo, Queen Of The Beast Men. because that is what she is, as well as being mother to some dragons. dragons. as it happens, that really do not like goats much.

her actual name is something like Dandelion Tachomachi or something, but it does not really matter as whatever it is i call her is much better.

them collectors and that like to see all sorts of details and things, so here you go, on me, here is the back of the box for her.

is she one of my favourite characters? she is ok, i suppose. there was a fair period when she kept taking all her clothes off, which was nice, but these days she seems to just mooch around in some blue outfit thing, being a Queen and doing whatever the hell it is a Queen does.

the dragons are pretty smart, like. oddly, we watched something called Age Of The Dragons last night, which she was not in, but Danny Glover and Vinnie Jones were. review to follow "eventually".

yes, i agree, probably time to have a close up look at that baby dragon keyring i got for my (considerably) better half. not Game Of Thrones relates so far as i am aware, but same thing.

but most of you might probably want to have another look at that Game Of Thrones one, so here you go, one more picture.

and no, she probably never will take it out of the box.

oh look, there's her proper name on the box, if you are all that interested or bothered. must be a nightmare to get that done on credit cards, or to spell it out over the phone to someone. especially if you were on the phone, right, to a sub-saharan based financial institution that are not all that brilliant at getting names right when they are written down in front of them.

anyway, we could not have a day of all just sitting at a box with a statue of Daenerys Targaryen, or whoever in it. it was lovely and sunny, so off to Whitby we went.

most, if not all, of Yorkshire had the same idea. the place was packed. actually it was not only people from Yorkshire, for on my travels i heard at least one Cockney accent and one Scouse accent.

the basics of this, then, are that i did not take all that many pictures, but here you go with what i did.

that is indeed William on one of them ride things he likes so much. this one was particularly impressive as it was, for some reason, free. there were no lights on so i said to William it probably wasn't working. i pressed the button to say "look" in respect of it not working, and off it went, so on he got and away he went!

also no we did not go up to the Abbey on this trip, but you can see it in the background of this picture.

yes we did indeed walk through them Whale bone things, but no i did not take a picture. it's something of a steep drop down thereafter, look you see, so i thought it prudent to keep an eye on the boys as they went through them.

on our travels i was delighted to find one of them etch-a-sketch machines. the last time i found one young William was still very much in Mummy's tummy, so it was ace to get an update.

yeah, this is a pic of it taken off the blackberry; i will do a proper scan and that eventually.

quite a job to get parts of all four of us in, as you can probably work out all by yourself, but we are all happy with it.

anyway, the next time i thought to take pictures, right, was when we were on the way back to Bessie, our chariot of choice that we command on the roads. whoops, sorry for that. i should probably have taken pics of my (considerably) better half going around the Dracula Experience thing with James, or of James and William in the class fun house thing we found. but didn't. sorry, too busy having fun.

also yes we did go on them 2p waterfall / cascade things, but didn't win anything of consequence.

we also spent a good 30 minutes or so touring the car parks of Whitby, eventually finding a spot behind some sort of health and fitness club. i think next time we shall certainly go via train, or go a good deal earlier in the morning.

there is a smart new park and ride thing there, just outside of Whitby. however, it looked like it would take you about 30mins to park and pay for it, and then there was the matter of the not quite built for speed buses taking people to and from Whitby. so that looks like it might be a good idea gone wrong. oh dear.

yeah, that's Sid or something, off of them Ice Age films. James won him by throwing hoops on some pegs. nice work, that was, to do that.

no we did not, alas, have any famous or celebrated Whitby cod & chips. as per mentions and suggestions thus far, the place was heaving, man. every fish and chip place had the most formidable of queues in front of it; an unwise thing to attempt with children in tow. we just had some less than celebrated hot dogs to keep us going, then, and that nice bloke Jonno sorted us out with some when we got home.

on the way back we drove past the bed & breakfast that has Dracula in the drive. i thought that for some reason you may want to see a picture of it, taken from Bessie, so here you go.

right, you will have to excuse me, i am knackered and tired, and it is verk tomorrow. bed and i shall meet soon, i hope.

i hope that whatever you did today was ace!

be excellent to each other!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!